Sex at Dawn
Sex at dawn is a book about the prehistoric roots of mankind's sexuality and the conclusions it comes to are staggering. I have rarely felt so vindicated in my life and it is truly liberating to have read this book. It gives me a new and much more open view of my innate sexuality - that quiet (sometimes loud) voice in my head telling me what I like and don't like, what I want to do and who I want to do.
Monogamy is a lie.
The Standard Narrative
This book covers a bunch of topics, starting with the standard narrative of human sexuality.
- Man
- wants to impregnate as many women as possible
- wants to ensure that he only raises his own kid.
- Woman
- wants to be impregnated by the highest quality male
- demands commitment
- demands monogamy - to ensure that all the mans resources go to her and her kids.
This leads to the conclusion that a woman will grab a man to raise her kids, while looking for a better man to have an affair with, likewise a man will sleep around with anybody he finds and both will constantly be on the lookout for infidelity.
Humans are born to be promiscuous
Sex at Dawn goes on to prove the standard narrative wrong in myriad ways and show that this standard narrative flies in the face of almost all the evidence on human sexuality. The book presents a theory that human sexuality evolved as a method of social bonding and that we are much more like the sexually promiscuous Bonobo (whose evolutionary path separated 5 million years ago) than the monogamous Gibbon (separated 22 million years ago).
Some Biological evidence in support of our promiscuous past
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| A Baboon's butt while estrous |
- Our testicles and penises are HUGE compared to monogamous or polygynous (1 man many wives) apes like the Gibbon, Gorilla and Orangutan. A Gorilla's penis is about 3cm.
- Hidden or discrete ovulation cycles, shared with Bonobos. E.g. Chimps and Baboons are famous for having bright red butts, which flare up when the time is right. A hidden cycle encourages round the clock mating. Because we can't know the right time, we do it all the time.
- Female humans shouts and screams during sex will turn the heads of all men within earshot. What purpose could this serve? Promiscuous Bonobos share this female copulatory vocalisation (FCV) trait but the monogamous Gibbons do not.
There's a bunch more including face-to-face mating and all the social aspects of love making like kissing and eye-gazing which adds strength to the argument but if you want to know more, you gotta go to the source.
The solution?
The take away solution to married life's problems - be open about and willing to discuss your desires with your partner. Allow yourself to look away from societies accepted path of marry, cheat, divorce, marry, cheat, divorce, marry, cheat, divorce, die and instead consider an unjealous polyamorous (many lovers) relationship. It may help strengthen your relationship and - god-forbid - allow you to be happy within yourself.
The Bottom Line
This is a controversial topic tackled in a way that lets you take it less seriously and have some fun with the idea. This book will open your eyes to the world and make you really think about how you live your life. Highly recommend - I give it a rating of 5/5 penises.
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