Saturday, 18 May 2013

Exam Fear - FILDI

We all know it. It's that fear that we get when we have been working towards something for an entire year and it's culminating in front of our eyes in a matter of hours. It's that pervasive fear that we are not good enough, that we will not arrive at our planned destination. That our lives will not work out as planned. It's the fear that somehow, no matter what we do, we will still fail and we will look foolish doing it.

I'm feeling this fear particularly sharply right now as my next exam closes in. This is shaping up to be the most difficult exam, and I don't feel prepared and I don't feel like I have the resources to tackle it properly. I am afraid and I am paralyzed by that fear.

So the question hangs in the air like a foul odour, "What do I do?".

The answer stares you in the face, holding you in its beady eye and relentlessly shouting at you, "Just do it!" but your fears have deafened you and you don't trust the answer. You think he is out to make a fool of you and that there must be another solution.

I'm borrowing a phrase from Ze Frank - F.I.L.D.I.

The only way to push through the fear is to face it. To look the answer straight in the face and say Fuck it, let's do it.

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